Just A Failure?
by trunks111
Summary: Is Naruto really just a failure or is there more to him? NejiNaruto. Yaoi. Shonen-ai. Neji is drawn to the failure. Can there be anything aside from animosity between them?
1. Why?

**A/N: New gay guy story. It's been a while since I've done one that's not AU. Hope you guys like it.**

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><p>'<em>I just can't escape<em>  
><em>It's like you're here with me now<em>  
><em>But the words you say<em>  
><em>They always seem to fade out<em>  
><em>Since you been away<em>  
><em>I'm just a face in the crowd<em>  
><em>Someday, Someday<em>  
><em>I know you're coming back<em>'

Why?

It was a question Neji found himself asking himself quite often lately.

Why did that failure catch his attention so?

He, a genius and prodigy, should not even look upon such complete failures.  
>Such as Lee.<p>

Speaking of which, where _was_ that failure?

It didn't take him long to spot the idiot. Standing there chatting with that _other _failure. Lee was gesturing enthusiastically as they talked. The shorter failure was sitting where he had gotten knocked in the earlier mock battle, bruises covered his body. His headband was shining nonetheless.

Lee helped him up and the blond dusted dirt from his orange jumpsuit.

Lee then bounded over to their sensei who seemed to be in a heated argument, on his part anyway, the other sensei, Kakashi Hatake, was just standing there and staring at the man like he was a fool.

The two talked for a moment before Gai declared something, gesturing as his student did and yelling loudly.

Tenten came to stand beside him.

"Wonder what's going on this time."

"It doesn't matter to me," he replied coldly, walking over to their sensei.

She stared after him, brown eyes full of hurt, even though she ought to be used to that after years of training with him.

It turned out Lee and Naruto wished to have a tournament featuring their two teams, they would put their names in a bag and draw them to decide who fought who first round, and winners of the two sides would face off then the winners of that match. All in one day too. Losers would then face off the next day.

The tournament would take place in three days, the two days before they were given off to do as they wished.

Neji knew he would spend the next two days training and stalked off without a word.  
>He went to the Hyuga compound and washed before sitting down to dinner. He ate in silence with the other Branch family members.<p>

As he laid in his bed that night his thoughts strayed to the failure in the orange jumpsuit.  
>Why? Why was he drawn to him in such a manner? They were complete opposites. He was quiet, Naruto was loud. He was a genius and prodigy, Naruto was a proven failure. So why was he drawn to him?<p>

- Naruto -

He and Lee had been talking after training that day. He was really excited to have the tournament. He was going to train extra hard to beat Neji and Sasuke. He knew he could beat them, he just had to train a little bit more.  
>He slurped the noodles in his fifth bowl of ramen, grinning and burping, thanking the owner before hopping off the stool and going back to his house.<p>

Neji was impressive, primarily hand to hand, he wasn't really fast like Lee, or overconfident like Sasuke, he seemed to know what was going to happen before it did and when he used his chakra.

But the blond had an idea of how to beat him. He just had to make it to that round or fight Neji first.

'_Shut your eyes let darkness lead the fight, say goodnight_  
><em>The rest will watch their future die, buried alive! say goodnight<em>  
><em>It's time to let out the dead, dead come alive, we wave the flag for the rest of our life<em>  
><em>So shut your eyes let darkness lead the fight, say goodnight, say good night<em>'

- Tournament day, Neji -

He had trained as usual when on his own. Finally it was the day of Lee's tournament.

The rounds were announced as thus: Neji v. Naruto, Sasuke v. Sakura, and Tenten v. Lee.

Neji bit back a snarl of distaste and took his position a few feet from the blond. The match started and he activated his Byakugan.

Naruto did his shadow clone jutsu.

Neji prepared for the assault, bracing his muscles for the rotation technique.  
>No attack came, the clones simply stood, staring him down.<p>

He charged them, as he went to hit the first, it disappeared with speed similar to Lee's. He spun to hit the clone behind him, the blow connected but he was to slow in turning to hit the other clone which tossed him to the sky by the shoulders. He brought his arms up to block, expecting a blow from a jumping Naruto, instead he was tackled from the sky around the middle, Naruto's shoulder deep in his stomach.

They crashed to the ground hard, Naruto on top, Neji stunned laying beneath him.

The match was called as Naruto's.

Grinning, Naruto stood and offered a hand to the other shinobi. He scoffed and stood himself, walking to the otherside of the clearing and leaning against a tree. Naruto's grin faded some as the older boy walked away.

Sasuke and Sakura fought next as Naruto sat underneath a tree, sitting so that his blond hair fell and cast a shadow over his tanned face.  
>He didn't understand. He just wanted Neji to be proud of him.<p>

- Neji -

Beaten, by a failure. The blond failure had beaten him. Him, a prodigy and genius. How? Why?

Why had he been beaten?

Naruto was a failure, that could never change. So why had he just lost to him?

'_It's only what I've seen,_  
><em>It's only just one dream.<em>  
><em>Tell my baby I love her,<em>  
><em>And I wish I could hold her.<em>  
><em>It's hard to say goodbye,<em>  
><em>When you know that it's over.<em>'


	2. Perfect

**A/N: Sorry about the lack of updates. Been busy and stressed. Trying to update. R&R please.**

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><p>'<em>And now I try hard to make it<em>  
><em>I just want to make you proud<em>  
><em>I'm never gonna be good enough for<em>  
><em>You can't pretend that I'm alright<em>  
><em>And you can't change me<em>'

The tournament continued to pit Naruto against both Tenten and Sasuke, while Sakura fought Neji and Lee.

The boys knocked Tenten and Sakura out early and easily.  
>Sasuke faced Naruto with a cold look in his eyes, just as Neji faced Lee.<p>

Sasuke started his grand fireball jutsu as Naruto made four clones, all rushing the raven haired boy. The clones were destroyed by the jutsu as Naruto burst through the smoke, his fist catching the other boy's jaw, causing him to stumble back before jumping at the brightly clad ninja with a kunai in hand.  
>Naruto seemed to disappear, leaving only a faint after image, reappearing behind Sasuke to kick him hard under the diaphram, knocking the air from his body as the blond then jumped and did a double hammer into the back of the boy's head.<p>

The match was immediately called as his, Sasuke laying face down in the dirt for a few moments before struggling to his feet, glaring at the blond.

Naruto grinned his huge grin, folding his arms behind his head.

Neji and Lee's match ended not long after, Lee heavily bruised, Neji announced as the winner.

Tomorrow, the girls would fight, then Sasuke and Lee, and lastly, Neji and Naruto again. Whoever won of Neji and Naruto would win their tournament.

"So does anyone want to come with me to Ichiraku?" the blond grinned at the other assembled shinobi.

Gai and Kakashi declined for different reasons, Tenten did because she had to go train some more, Sakura did because she said Naruto was an idiot, Lee because he was going with Gai, and Sasuke and Neji simply stalked off.

As the other shinobi walked away from him, his grin faded to nothing, all the cheer and usual happiness gone.  
>Alls he had wanted to do was to make them proud of him..., and nothing..., not a single word was said. He beat two of the best genin from their village and nobody even commented on it.<br>He could feel tears beginning to form. It was so unfair..., so what he wasn't perfect. He just wanted to get noticed! By anyone...

'_Cause we lost it all_  
><em>Nothin' lasts forever<em>  
><em>I'm sorry I can't be perfect<em>  
><em>Now it's just too late<em>  
><em>And we can't go back<em>  
><em>I'm sorry I can't be perfect<em>  
><em>I try not to think<em>  
><em>About the pain I feel inside<em>'

The next day at training instead of wearing his typical orange jumpsuit, Naruto showed up wearing a pair of loose fitting bright orange pants and a plain black short sleeved shirt, his head band still tied to his forehead, but even it seemed less shiny that day.

No one commented on his changed attire, the matches began with the girl's fight first.

Not once did the blond smile, he just sat under a giant shady tree, knees drawn partially to his chest with his arms folded and elbows resting on his knees, head tilted so that a shadow was cast over his eyes.

Neji noticed the change in the usually energetic blond immediately.  
>Something was wrong. He didn't know how he knew, or why, or even why the hell he cared, but he knew it.<p>

He studied the blond, sitting across the field, whereas he was standing leaning against a giant tree.  
>Naruto merely sat, nothing else, didn't look up, didn't move.<br>He was dressed differently, Neji noticed with a slight shock. Always, since beginning at the academy, the blond was clad in all orange, his orange jumpsuit.

So why not today?  
>What made today so special?<p>

Neji pondered this as he stared at the blond.  
>So deep in thought was he that he jumped slightly when Lee spoke, having come to stand beside him moments before.<p>

"Something is wrong with Naruto-chan," Lee spoke simply.

"Of course there's something wrong with him," Neji scoffed, pretending indifference.

"You know what I mean Neji. Something is wrong with him, you should talk to him." Lee insisted.

"Why would I talk to the likes of him?" Neji snapped.

"Because you care for him. He is a fellow shinobi and if something is wrong, we must figure out what it is. You have been staring in his direction since he arrived," Lee replied calmly.

Neji didn't reply.

Naruto was a failure. Plain and simple. He had lost because of a fluke. That wouldn't happen again. He would prove that later today.  
>His gaze grew hard as he looked upon the blond shinobi.<p>

At last, it was time for his fight with Naruto.

It started much the same way, but there was a listless quality to the way the blond fought, almost as if he didn't care about the fight, didn't care about anything.

Neji kicked his game up, determined to beat the failure.

Yet, as they fought, Naruto matched him, blow for blow, attack for attack.  
>And then, Naruto won, he had a clone distract him, giving it chakra to make it seem like him, then the real Naruto burst from the trees, hitting Neji so hard he flew through the air for ten feet before hitting the ground, nearly knocked unconscious.<p>

The blond was announced the winner and the teams decided a day off for the next day, then they would train for a day, then the Hokage would be assigning their two teams a B-ranked mission, which they would get two days to prepare for.

Naruto didn't comment, merely stood and waited to leave, his eyes fixed upon the green grass.

Why?

It was a question Neji was beginning to get tired of.

Why did he care what was wrong with the dumb blond?

Why did he notice the blond?

Why had he lost, twice, to that failure?

Why?

He was a prodigy, a genius! Yet he had lost...

Could he be wrong?

'_Nothing's gonna change the things that you said_  
><em>And nothing's gonna make this right again<em>  
><em>Please don't turn your back<em>  
><em>I can't believe it's hard just to talk to you<em>  
><em>But you don't understand<em>'


	3. Thoughts

'_I look inside of myself and try to find someone else_  
><em>Someone who's willin' to die as to watch you crying for help<em>  
><em>I know that blood will be spilled and if you won't then I will<em>  
><em>My grave will never be filled it's either kill or be killed<em>'

Naruto continued to dress differently. Not once did he wear his usual orange jumpsuit, instead wearing pale orange, bright orange, or black pants with either a plain black shirt or a neon orange shirt. No one knew why he dressed differently, and if they would have paid more attention, they would have noticed the pain in his blue eyes, the sadness. He no longer smiled or grinned.  
>He seemed just a shadow of the blond he had been days before.<p>

On the day of the mission, Naruto wore a neon black shirt and a pair of bright orange pants.

Their mission was rather simple, escort an important ally to Land of Waves. They would likely be attacked by bandits, thugs, and maybe rogue ninja from Hidden Mist. Of course, they were to protect the man with their lives.  
>The blond was quiet during the briefing and as they set out. None commented.<p>

- First night -

Naruto and Neji both volunteered for first watch so Kakashi said that watch would be done in pairs, first the two of them, then Sasuke and Lee, lastly Tenten and Sakura.  
>The genin nodded and sat at opposite ends of camp.<p>

The night was quiet, and to Neji, the silence seemed deafening. He had the insane desire to talk to the blond.  
>It was insane because the blond was a clear failure and he was a prodigy. He had no time for failures. But that failure had beaten him <em>twice<em>. One fluke was likely, but two? Improbable.

Could the blond not really be a failure? Impossible.

He had never successfully done a jutsu. He took years to pass the academy and was always goofing around. Wasting time. He didn't know why he cared.

'_Words turn into blood and the blood keeps on pourin'_  
><em>From every pour I wipe it off 'cause this just could be the moment<em>  
><em>Now someones gotta die and I'm my only opponent<em>'

Naruto sat, brooding, listening to the soundless night.

He just wanted noticed. By someone, anyone. He knew he had improved greatly. He just wished someone would take notice of that. Sure, he liked joking around and pranks, but he was a ninja. He never broke his promises. He was stronger than everyone gave him credit. Those that saw past his demon side anyway, he smiled ruefully at this, remembering how much pain the villagers had caused him growing up. But then Iruka had showed up.  
>Things had been decent, for a few years. Not long after graduating and being assigned to team 7, he and Iruka had drifted further apart.<br>He had learned what the fox had done to Iruka's parents. How Iruka still cared for him regardless. It amazed him. And drove him to loving the man like the father he never had.  
>Yet, everyone he cared about pushed him away. No one paid attention to him anymore. He hadn't pulled any pranks since his academy years. That couldn't have been the only reason people paid him attention, could it? He didn't want to believe it, but it was likely true.<br>He trained hard, endlessly, until he was so exhausted he couldn't move. Yet still, none acknowledged his change in skill or hard work. He got no recognition.

He just wanted someone to care for him, was that to much to ask?

- Neji -

He stared across the camp site at the blond who was just sitting there motionlessly.

He felt drawn to him. He had never felt this way before, about anyone. He always had a mission, something he had to do.  
>Was this like that? Did he need to talk to the blond?<p>

Before he knew it, he was crouched beside the blond who looked over at him with mild surprise in his blue eyes, an expression of utter boredum on his face.

"Yeah?" the blond asked.

Neji thought franticly, no idea why he had walked over. "I think our watch is almost over, we should rouse the other two."

Naruto simply nodded and got up, not bothering to offer the other boy a hand as he usually would.

As Neji laid on his bedroll, unable to get to sleep he thought of the blond. Of his strange behavior, of his different clothes, of the nothingness in his eyes.  
>Lastly, he thought of why he cared. It didn't make sense that he would. The blond was nothing but a failure, wasn't he?<p>

- Naruto -

He had seen the surprised look in Neji's eyes when he came over. He had seen the shock at looking at his empty eyes. He smiled then, a sad twisted smile.  
>He could be emotionless too, like them. He could.<p>

Maybe then they would notice him. The change in him.  
>He was already being record quiet. He had probably exceeded expectations in beating Neji twice.<br>They probably thought his fox had helped, but that wasn't the case. He had done it on his own. His own skill and chakra. He borrowed none from the fox, preferring to beat Neji on his own skill. And he did. Alas, no recognition for it. He had beat one of the best genin and gotten absolutely no recognition. Not even a 'good job'.

Nothing.

He beat Neji Hyuga and Sasuke Uchiha, and for what?

Nothing.

Nothing happened after he beat them. No one congratulated him, no one told him he had gotten stronger, no one said anything to him. Not one word.

That's all he wanted, one word. Maybe two. Something.  
>Anything was better than that stony silence.<p>

Yet, no one gave him anything. No one said anything.

Maybe they were right all along. And he really was just a failure.  
>He had worked hard to prove them wrong for years. At last, he had beaten the two best genin. Yet, no one gave him any recognition for it.<p>

Maybe it would be best if he just left. Left and never came or looked back. Not that anyone would care anyway.

Naruto rolled over, forcing his mind to quiet so he could get some sleep.

'_I'm everything you couldn't be now you believe in the devil_  
><em>I gotta Pick up the pieces I gotta bury them deep<em>  
><em>And when the dirt hits the coffin just go to sleep<br>_

_Now that I see..._  
><em>I see you buried<em>  
><em>Six feet Below<br>_

_Another life goes into the night,_  
><em>I couldn't let 'em breathe 'cause I didn't wanna die<br>_

_Now that I see..._  
><em>I see you buried<em>  
><em>Six Feet Below<em>

_It's not alright can you hear me as i cry_  
><em>I couldn't let you live 'cause I didn't wanna die<em>'


	4. Leaving

**A/N: Sorry about the lack of updates. Been busy and stressed. Trying to update. R&R please.**

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><p>'<em>Shut your eyes let darkness lead the fight, say goodnight<em>  
><em>The rest will watch their future die, buried alive! say goodnight<em>  
><em>It's time to let out the dead, dead come alive, we wave the flag for the rest of our life<em>  
><em>So shut your eyes let darkness lead the fight, say goodnight, say good night<em>'

They finished the mission without any problems.

They were given the next two days off.  
>As Naruto walked back to his house, he slowly realized that he was going to leave. He had decided it that first night of the mission. He wasn't sad about leaving. The place had never really been a home to him. People hated him.<p>

He packed a few things on auto-pilot. He exchanged dirty clothes for a few clean pairs then showered before putting his pack back on and walking back out of his house.  
>The blond wouldn't miss this place. Or his so-called friends and comrades. He would leave his headband for someone to find. They wouldn't be able to identify it as his, but he would leave it.<p>

He wore bright orange pants and a black shirt with a swirl on it. He walked, not feeling a single thing. It was likely he was numb. He realized no one cared about him. Not really. He would leave and they would all be better off for it.

Having spent so many hours in the Hokage's office, he knew where he would go. First, he would travel south through Fire country and then into Tea country where he would travel to the port city. Once there, he would travel to Sea country, Haha Island. From there, he would find someone to take him to Marsh country. And from there on, he would walk to Demon country.

He smiled, a sad and twisted smile. He was likely going to his death. But perhaps not. There would be much the demons could teach him. Of that he was sure. Of course, they would likely try to kill him, but that was where nine-tails came in. By that time, he hoped to have been talking to the beast. They did speak as it were, but speaking more. He would get the fox to teach him control of their chakras. To fuse and meld their chakras. Without Naruto, the fox would cease to exist.

He spoke to the fox on occasion. Soon, especially while traveling, he would begin to speak to him constantly. He would learn and the fox would be his teacher. It would better their survival. He would learn much. After staying in Demon country, he figured he would travel to Lightning country, simply because he had always wanted to see it.

Finally, he was near the eastern gate. The gate was open as it was midafternoon. Benches lined the street.  
>He reached up and untied his headband. The headband he had worked so hard to get. He stared at it a moment, still he felt nothing. He laid the headband on the bench before continuing down the street and out the gate. It would probably take about a week for him to reach Tea country. Maybe a little bit longer.<p>

He walked down the road, not once looking back.

'_There's a black flag hangin' over this town, get down! (get down!)_  
><em>There's a black flag hangin' over this town, get down! (get down!)<em>  
><em>There's a black flag hangin' over this town, get down! (get down!)<em>  
><em>There's a black flag hangin' over this town, get down! (get down! get down!)<em>

_In the land of the weak, we'll put you to sleep, put you to sleep, yeah, put you to sleep_  
><em>Walk to the sky as you beg for your life, beg for your life, yeah, beg for your life<em>'

Always, Neji's thoughts returned to the blond. He had been quiet all mission. Very unusual. He never once donned his orange jumpsuit either. Sometimes he had to be asked a question two or three times before he even noticed someone was talking to him.  
>But what bothered him the most, was that it was that failure. He thoughts never failed to drift to him. No matter what he was doing, his thoughts always drifted to him.<p>

For the whole two days they were given off, Neji trained. Tirelessly. He returned home both days with new bruises and cuts.  
>Yet no matter how hard he worked himself, he thought of Naruto.<p>

He thought of the change in his clothing. He thought of the change in his eyes. The emptyness, the pain, the sadness. The quiet.

These things haunted his dreams. The scene would be the first day Naruto had changed from his normal attire. Except this time, he went over to the blond. He knelt infront of him and peered into his eyes. The blond's normally cheerful and happy baby blue eyes were empty, yet full of pain, loneliness, and sadness.  
>This dream continued to haunt him well after the mission. Sometimes, the blond would say things like "Why didn't you take my hand?", "Why are you so cold to me?", "What did I ever do to you?", and lastly, "Why won't you save me?"<p>

The ones where the blond spoke to him haunted him the most. His voice would sound tired, scared, and just plain _defeated_.  
>Naruto was always cheerful, always happy, always saying "Believe it!" and "I will be Hokage someday!"<br>Everyone always scoffed at him and laughed.

His dreams haunted him.

Training began again, as did missions. Still, his dreams haunted him.

None yet knew, but Naruto was gone and not coming back. He told no one and no one suspected. Would any notice his absence? Would any care? How long would it take for someone to notice?  
>A week passed, and no one has begun to look for the blond. Only four people have noticed his absence: Kakashi, Sakura, Sasuke, and Iruka. The only four that have noticed. Yet none mention it beyond, "He's probably sick or something."<br>Iruka is to busy with things at the Academy to go check on his former student, sure Kakashi would notify him if something had happened.  
>Yet Kakashi is preoccupied with keeping his own mind whole, the missions have been weighing more heavily as of late and he has been losing his grip more often, despite Jiraiya's books.<p>

'_Shut your eyes let darkness lead the fight, say goodnight_  
><em>The rest will watch their future die, buried alive! say goodnight<em>  
><em>It's time to let out the dead, dead come alive, we wave the flag for the rest of our life<em>  
><em>So shut your eyes let darkness lead the fight, say goodnight, say good night<em>'


	5. Changes

**A/N: Someday, I will do an entire story on this song. I do not know when. In the next month or over the summer. But, I do hope those of you that are reading this will look up this song and what it stands for. Make It Stop(September's Children) by Rise Against.  
>This subject is something Very important to me. If ever you need someone, reach out. No matter the cost, say something. Stand up.<br>Just please, do not give up. There is always something to fight for. **

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><p>'<em>Bang, bang go the coffin nails, like a breath exhaled,<em>

_Then gone forever._  
><em>It seems like just yesterday, how did I miss the red flags raised?<em>  
><em>Think back to the days we laughed.<em>  
><em>We braved these bitter storms together.<em>  
><em>Brought to his knees he cried,<em>  
><em>But on his feet he died.<em>'

It was a full two months until Naruto's living place was searched. They found no sign of him of course. No note, nothing.  
>He was just gone.<p>

Said blond was well on his way to Demon country. His emotions suspended somewhere he had vowed to never go to again. It brought him nothing but pain to feel. And so, he would cease to.

No one knew where the blond would go.  
>Missions were organized by the ANBU to track the Akatsuki and see if they had captured him. They found naught.<p>

The boy was gone.

When Neji heard of his disappearance, the news shook him to his very core. It was then he realized why his thoughts strayed, why his mind wouldn't let him rest. He loved Naruto. Loved him. Not as a comrade, or a friend, as something much, much more.  
>'Love...,' he mused, 'I love a failure. But..., he is obviously not one. No, he is something better than that.'<p>

'_What God would damn a heart?_  
><em>And what God drove us apart?<em>

_What God could make it stop?_  
><em>Let this end.<em>  
><em>Eighteen years pushed to the ledge.<em>  
><em>It's come to this,<em>  
><em>A weightless step.<em>  
><em>On the way down singing,<em>  
><em>Woah, woah.<em>'

Searches continued for another two months before they gave up. No word, no one matching his description could be remembered passing through.  
>Still though, Neji thought of the blond, his thoughts never straying far. If any noticed his distraction, they said naught.<br>The chunin exam came and went, he passed, as did the other genin from Konoha.  
>He wanted to go after Naruto, but he had no idea where the blond might have gone. And so, he trained, even harder than he had before.<p>

Six months later, Neji took and passed the Jounin exam. Even Gai was surprised at his progress.  
>He continued to train, pushing his body well past it's limits. Most days it took two of the ninja he had grown up with to help carry him to the Hyuga Compound. He pushed so hard in effort to push Naruto from his mind. Nevertheless, the blond intruded his thoughts and dreams.<br>No matter how hard he trained, how many A and S-ranked missions he took, the blond always wormed his way into his thoughts.

He was eight months missing. Eight months since the mission when Neji saw him last.

'_Bang, bang from the closet walls,_  
><em>The schoolhouse halls,<em>  
><em>The shotgun's loaded.<em>  
><em>Push me and I'll push back.<em>  
><em>I'm done asking, I demand.<em>

_From a nation under God,_  
><em>I feel its love like a cattle prod.<em>  
><em>Born free, but still they hate.<em>  
><em>Born me, no I can't change.<em>'

Naruto was in Demon Country.

His smile was wicked. He and the fox had become great friends in the last months. Naruto could control their chakras with ease. Their thoughts more often melded than not.  
>His reflexes were sharper, his body was stronger.<p>

And he reveled in it.  
>He spoke to the demons residing in Demon Country and they spoke back. They taught him things and he taught them a few things of humans, uncaring of the consequences. He grew even more lean and well-muscled as the months passed. His blond hair grew lighter from his time in the sun and shaggier from lack of cutting it. His eyes were no longer happy or empty, but cold and hard. His smile, if he smiled, was wicked and fanged, his canines elongated permanently from his long connection to the fox.<p>

He stayed in Demon Country for another two full moon cycles. At last, having learnt all he could from the demons, he set out for Lightning Country.  
>Before he left though, he chopped his hair back to a more reasonable length, using his reflection in the water to make it even.<p>

'_It's always darkest just before the dawn._  
><em>So stay awake with me, let's prove them wrong.<em>

_Make it stop._  
><em>Let this end,<em>  
><em>Eighteen years pushed to the ledge.<em>  
><em>It's come to this,<em>  
><em>A weightless step.<em>  
><em>On the way down singing,<em>  
><em>Woah, woah.<em>'

Neji was summoned to the Hokage's office.  
>He went, wondering if it was another mission, his last had been an A-ranked, two days before.<p>

"Someone fitting Naruto's description was spotted going through the edges of Fire Country not long ago."

Neji simply stared at Tsunade.

"We are sending a team of his former teammates to follow him and bring him back if it is, indeed, Naruto."

Still he stared, shocked, almost numb.

"Sakura and Kakashi have opted to go. Would you like to join them?"

It took him a moment to speak.  
>"Why me?"<p>

"Speculation. Will you or not?" she asked, clasping her hands together on her desk.

"I will."

"Good. They will be at the North Gate."

He nodded and disappeared in a plume of smoke.

His thoughts swirled. 'Where had he been? Why had he gone? Is it really him? Does he feel about me as I do him?'  
>These thoughts plagued him as he nodded a greeting to the other two shinobi and they set out, a brisk pace, soon they were jumping and weaving through the forest.<p>

'_And too much blood has flown from the wrists,_  
><em>Of the children shamed for those they chose to kiss.<em>  
><em>Who will rise to stop the blood?<em>'

He sensed them. Coming fast. He stopped in the middle of the road. His ears listening for the sound of their feet hitting the hard ground.  
>They hit, not even a moment later.<p>

He did not turn. They spoke though. It was them.

"Naruto...?" the soft scared female voice uttered.  
>It was <span>her<span>. The one he had longed for for years. Years. She had laughed at him, called him an idiot.

He didn't even turn when the man spoke. His teacher. His sensei. The second possible father he had ever known.

"Naruto?"

That... That voice. It was _him_. The one whose help he had longed for. The help he dreamed of. The help he desperately needed. The help he craved.  
>He had come. For him.<br>Something in him began to slowly crack, not to break completely, but it cracked.

It was then he turned, turned to face those he had turned his back on as they had turned theirs on him.  
>They visibly recoiled, all but <em><span>him<span>_. 'Why? Why did he not back away? Why did he not run in fear?'

Naruto smiled then, his predatory, wicked, and fanged smile, it was not a nice smile. Not at all.  
>When he spoke, his voice, it was gravelly, deeper than it had been, and full of a sad amusement. "What do you want?"<p>

"To bring you back." It was _he_ who spoke.

"Bring... Me back...," Naruto echoed his words, his eyes never leaving the Hyuga's.

_He_ met Naruto's gaze without fear, but with a mix of other emotions, forefront were pain and love. It was Naruto who recoiled then.  
>It was impossible! No, no, he would not believe it! But eyes, especially those of the Hyuga's did not lie.<p>

"There is naught for me there."

Suddenly, tired of pretense, Neji took a step forward, stopping when Naruto crouched low, much like a cornered animal.  
>"I am there."<p>

Naruto was silent, studying the Hyuga with cold, hard eyes. No more words were spoken.

"You two," Naruto pointed slowly at Sakura and Kakashi, "Leave now. You have no purpose here."

Kakashi stiffened and Sakura nearly sobbed but she held her tongue and composure.  
>"You know I cannot do that," Kakashi's words were soft, but powerful.<p>

"If you want even a glimmer of hope that I can be swayed, you must," Naruto responded just as quiet and forceful as Kakashi had been.  
>The changes were even more evident then. He was not the genin who had left a mere ten months before. Where ever he had gone, whatever he had seen, whatever he had done, had changed him. Irrevocably so.<p>

With obvious difficulty, Kakashi and Sakura obliged him, going back to Konoha, slowly though, not at the fevered pace at which they had left.

'_Make it stop,  
>Let this end.<br>This life chose me, I'm not lost in sin.  
>But proud I stand of who I am,<br>I plan to go on living._'

"Why did you come?" Naruto's voice rang hollow.

"I was selected," Neji calmly replied, his eyes never leaving the blond's.  
>It was difficult to believe that who stood before him was once the most cheerful and happy shinobi in all of the lands. He looked so..., broken.<p>

"You did not answer my question." His voice sounded strained now.

"I... I wanted to see if it was really you," Neji replied, his voice shaking just a small bit.

"Why?"

"I needed to know," was his response.

"But why?"

Neji was silent, considering his next words.  
>"Because I love you."<p>

'_Make it stop,_  
><em>Let this end,<em>  
><em>All these years pushed to the ledge,<em>  
><em>But proud I stand, of who I am,<em>  
><em>I plan to go on living<em>'


	6. For

'_Search for the answers I knew all along_  
><em>I lost myself, we all fall down<em>  
><em>Never the wiser of what I've become<em>  
><em>Alone I stand, a broken man<em>  
><em>All I have is one last chance<em>  
><em>I won't turn my back on you<em>  
><em>Take my hand, drag me down<em>  
><em>If you fall then I will too<em>  
><em>And I can't save what's left of you<em>'

"Love?" his laugh echoed hollowly. "You? Love me?"

Neji said nothing, staring at the blond.

Naruto's laughter ended suddenly, his face serious, his tone even more so.  
>"I don't know if I can love anymore."<p>

"I wasn't sure of that myself," Neji admitted quietly, his eyes averting for a brief moment. "But I am now. I know I can love you. And if I can love you, you surely, can love me."

"Brave words," Naruto commented, but there wasn't force behind it.  
>His eyes looked lost again. Their usual brightness, dark.<br>"I do not know..."

"Neither do I. But isn't that supposed to be half of the battle?" Neji asked wryly.

Their eyes met then. They saw each other in ways no other person had ever seen them.  
>Naruto saw Neji's pain, his fear of this new territory, but the surety of his actions and words.<br>Neji saw Naruto's torment, his pain, his sadness, he saw that love had once burned brightly, now, it merely flickered.

"For you..., I suppose I will come back...," Naruto said softly, his eyes not leaving Neji's.

A small smile graced Neji's lips then, a smile of hope, uncertainty.

Neji extended his hand to the blond. Still looking deeply into Neji's eyes, the blond took it, clasped it firmly.

"I will return with you."

"Together, we will begin a new journey," Neji affirmed with a slight nod.

Naruto nodded back, a new light in his eyes.

'_Say something new_  
><em>I have nothing left<em>  
><em>I can't face the dark without you<em>  
><em>There's nothing left to lose<em>  
><em>The fighting never ends<em>  
><em>I can't face the dark without you<em>  
><em>Follow me under and pull me apart<em>  
><em>I understand, there's nothing left<em>  
><em>Pain so familiar and close to the heart<em>  
><em>No more, no less, I won't forget<em>  
><em>Come back down, save yourself<em>  
><em>I can't find my way to you<em>  
><em>And I can't bear to face the truth<em>'

Together, they returned to the village. There was no welcome back, they merely transported themselves into the Hokage's office.  
>She looked up, slightly surprised, but she hid it well.<p>

"Naruto?" her eyes widened at his state.

He simply nodded.

She looked to Neji and he gave a slight shake of his head. Neither would say why he had left, maybe in time, it would come out, but not then.  
>She nodded, accepting their silence, Neji gently took the blond's hand and transported them into his quarters at the Hyuga Compound.<p>

Neji slept on the floor the first night, allowing Naruto to have his bed.

They spoke very little for the first few weeks. Naruto went out to the training grounds with Neji, but other than that, he never strayed far from the black haired shinobi.

One night, as they laid in darkness, Naruto spoke. "I love you Neji Hyuga."

Neji blushed brightly in the darkness but after a moment he responded, "And I love you Naruto Uzumaki."

Naruto smiled then, a ghost of his old smile, this one mixed with pain, deep pain.

Neji saw then, as he had seen over the last few weeks, Naruto was not just a failure. He was truly amazing, his time away had strengthened, quietened, and aged the blond. He was not definitely not the same boy that had left.  
>He realized that he too, had changed. He was very different as well.<p>

Could past hurts be forgotten and healed? Could they love?

Time would tell.

But he believed that they could.  
>For once, Neji Hyuga, loved someone, truly.<br>For once, Naruto Uzumaki, was loved by someone, truly.  
>As always, a new beginning began with two unlikely people. A new beginning. A new future.<p>

'_I wanted to forgive_

_I'm trying to forgive_  
><em>Don't leave me here again<em>  
><em>I am with you forever, the end<em>  
><em>Holding the hand that holds me down<em>  
><em>I forgive you, forget you, the end<em>  
><em>Holding the hand that holds me down<em>  
><em>I forgive you, forget you, the end<em>'

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Definitely not how I pictured this going and ending. But that is it. The end. I hope you enjoyed it. Maybe, there will be a sequel, but I doubt it. I would like you to imagine their future. It is not for me to write. If you understand this, you are wise beyond what the vast majority of this world would ever dream.**


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